A little poem… perhaps motivated by Christmas gorging guilt


There was a lovely orchard of pears,

Who received pervey stares,

From apples passing and other fruit

Who all wanted to give their wives the boot

And begin adulterous affairs

With voluptuous pears

But one day a pineapple went by

What he saw, made him cry

For the pears he did so adore,

Were thin right down to the core

There they were holding on to glossy mags,

With skinny coffees and laxartive fags,

That night the pervey fruit all did return to their wives

And looked admiringly at their boring lives

So ladies if you feel you are being ogled at and inviting unwanted passion

Go size zero, look a startling mess and all in the name of fashion.