I know it was a while ago, but I’ve got a bee in my knickers and I can’t shake it. So, it was Valentine’s Day and my boyfriend sweetly arranged to take me out. I’ve always hated the idea of Valentine’s Day – I really have. You’ll hear me ranting ‘it’s bloody absurd’ or ‘it’s commercial bullshit’ etc. but the second it is the 14th of February and my boyfriend hasn’t done anything, he’s in trouble…
Two faced you might say. Well , yes. But mainly a coward. One 14th of February, while I was at university, my boyfriend at the time didn’t get me anything. I watched flowers and cards pour in for the other girls and boys in my halls, because even if chicks were single, there were blokes trying to woo/bed them. I got nothing. Everybody asked: “ohhh, so what did your boyfriend get you?” When I replied that we didn’t believe in it, they just gave me a look of pity, their eyes telling me ‘you’re not really loved.’ I ran to my room, called my boyfriend and got him to send me something. When it arrived the next day, I blamed the Royal Mail.
At that moment I decided to change my attitude towards Valentine’s Day. Yes, you shouldn’t need one day a year to show your loved one that you love them. But, if there is one day a year where you can make each other feel really extra special, then why the hell be the couple in the corner not doing it?
That is one serious tangent. Back on track – so it was Valentine’s day and we were at the suave restaurant, Kensington Place drinking Cupid’s cocktails and munching on the Valentine’s menu, which was comprised of oysters, delicious prawn cocktails, and all sorts of the deliciousnes the sea has to offer.
We were also knocking back the wine, I might have knocked a glass over.
Post fish, my boyfriend came to sit next to me, give me a kiss, and hold my hand; PDA all the way! There were only two other couples, who were doing eye gazing, we were drunk and it’s bloody Valentine’s Day!
A stroppy lady came up and said ‘Please could you stop that. We need to think about our other customers.’
The snobby restaurant, delusional about their popularity was more than happy to go all Valentine’s Day in an attempt to reap in extra cash, but the second a couple show affection – they chuck us out…
We left the restaurant in a fury and made faces at the offending waitress. Mature – I know.
They thought they’d seen the last of us, but I’ll be back! No one tells me no snogging…